GOAT USA towns to relocate/retire to

Basically I made it from crypto ($2.1M), rent in a godawful expensive and shitty american city, and want to go live somewhere else (but still in USA) that costs less but with still good amenities

>big town or midsize city (100k population max)
>2br sfh $400k tops
>a nice downtown with some good restaurants when the occasion strikes
>lots of outdoor stuff to do
>not psychotically hot, cold or humid
>maybe a college or vacation type town for access to premium roasties
>under the radar / not getting mogged by CA economic refugees

Someone shilled Bend to me, it kinda looks nice but seems like it's already turning into another Portland and houses are way too expensive. Bend-20-years-ago would have been perfect though. Looking for that vibe.

  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Sedalia Missouri might be what you’re looking for.
    >Housing is cheap
    >tons of forest for outdoor activities
    >big enough to have nice restaurants
    >Kansas City is a 1.5 hour ride away if you want to see big concerts or sport games
    >UCM in Warrensburg has tons of college girls
    >Down to earth, simple minded people. Mostly farmers
    It does get quite cold in winter however

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Spokane

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Spokane kind of sucks. I would move to Wenatchee, though.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Boise Idaho

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Boise already blew up thanks to the WFH boom. It's insufferable Karen territory now.

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I lived in state college PA for five years and it ticks most of your boxes. I really liked it there and I may retire there

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Visited State College once. VERY cozy vibes. Such a nice little college town. Kind of out of the way though

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    take up golf
    wherever you go will have nice golf

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Thats funny because im from bend and was about to shill it until you said that kek. Its cold as shit alot of the time here.
    Idk nothing about housing but it seems a bit inflated here, my neighbours just moved.
    >under the radar / not getting mogged by CA economic refugees
    Dont come here honestly. Also traffic is getting bad. Unless you really like skiing/ mountain sports.
    Could i ask you about your crypto investments? How much did you start out with and what were you mostly trading?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Could i ask you about your crypto investments?
      50k initial in 2018, 20xed it by bagholding LINK for 3 years, rolled it over in 2020 into btc/eth/xmr and sold most of it nowhere near the top in late '21 but also nowhere near the bottom either, so it worked out alright. Basically totally missed all the defi, shitcoin and nft 1000000xs, but I also never got rugpulled, scammed or hacked so I guess it's fine.

      >Unless you really like skiing/ mountain sports.
      Not even that much, mostly I just hike and bike. From what I read it sounds like it's fastly becoming as expensive as a first-class ski town but without any of the exclusivity, prestige, or comfy vibes you'd expect from a place like Aspen or Breckenridge.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Its crazy expensive here, i live with my parents but im leaving to Mexico. Bend has a cracker vibe, not super friendly, people are cliqueish. Check out Ashland in southern oregon but im pretty sure its expensive af too. Grants pass is worth mentioning too. Might actually be perfect, but i can only talk about places in Oregon.
        Im trying to find a good investment on crypto, get some passive income somehow but my net worth is like 25k if you count my car lol.

        I also made it from crypto this cycle. Personally, I moved to Chiang Mai after spending a month in Thailand and really loving it here. The cost of living is pretty cheap, the quality of the housing is better then in the west, flying to nearby countries is very cheap and easy, tons of beautiful girls, some of the best food in the world, and access to a lot of beautiful nature. It does get quite hot in this part of the world though, but honestly if you're posting here you'll be spending all day in an air conditioned house or car so it doesn't matter.

        Here are some examples of a $100k and $500k place in Chiang Mai.

        Nice. I love chiang mai. Best sex i ever had from a chick from there. How did you make it? Im assuming you have millions but what type of intitial investments are we talking?

        Are citizens of bend called Benders?

        No. Theyre called "Bendites" and its the cringiest shit.

        Bend will get cheaper during a recession really nice area along with Redmond the only problem is your beholden to Portland politicians who run the state we used to have a very moderate Republican Senator in Gordon smith now it’s two far lefties

        Weird that someone is posting from Bend too. This place might attract/breed alot of autists

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          fuck man i just drove through ashland a few weeks ago. place is more fucked than berkeley now. i know its always been a weird place with the college and theater people and hippies but holy shit has it gotten "progressive"

        • 2 months ago
          in all fields

          >Bend has a cracker vibe, not super friendly, people are cliqueish
          That's all of Oregon. People are super unfriendly and cunty and standoffish in the PNW. It's like the meme with the swedes not feeding guests, same culture. It's pretty but otherwise one of my least favorite parts of the country.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I actually turned a small amount of money into over a million twice now. Below is a rough timeline of my investments without doxxing myself. I'm 28 now.
          2011: Learn about Bitcoin, don't buy into it (was too busy playing WoW to care to learn about how to setup miners or anything)
          2012-2017: get BS/MS in Computer Science
          2013: FOMO into Bitcoin at around $250-300, buy $5k worth (almost all my money at the time)
          2016: First cuck job, making $1500/mo, use these funds to buy some more Bitcoin before the 2017 bullrun
          2017-2021: Work for various tech companies, salary almost reaches $200k
          2020: Start investing in the stock market actively after getting WFH job. Started with $25k in a Robinhood account to avoid day trading penalties. Eventually surpassed $1M in this account after a year trading stocks and options. Notable money makers for me were MRNA, TSLA, SPY shorts, and GME. I bought a bunch of GME when it was below $10 and this alone made me another $800k.
          2021: Retire from tech with several million in the bank. Now I'm working on game dev in my spare time for fun.

          And yea, Thai women are pretty great in every way. Protip: explore the isan region sometime. It may not have much, but it does have the most beautiful women you'll find in SEA. They are also the most loyal and wife material women you'll meet in Thailand.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >trading stocks and options.
            how da fuq were you so successful

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              My autistic superpowers helped I guess.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Are citizens of bend called Benders?

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    St. George, Utah might fit most of your criteria. It’s not as Mormon as it used to be. It is suffering some growing pains but the outskirts have some nice areas. Near lots of outdoor activities.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I also made it from crypto this cycle. Personally, I moved to Chiang Mai after spending a month in Thailand and really loving it here. The cost of living is pretty cheap, the quality of the housing is better then in the west, flying to nearby countries is very cheap and easy, tons of beautiful girls, some of the best food in the world, and access to a lot of beautiful nature. It does get quite hot in this part of the world though, but honestly if you're posting here you'll be spending all day in an air conditioned house or car so it doesn't matter.

    Here are some examples of a $100k and $500k place in Chiang Mai.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Does crypto have a future or is it already dead by now?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      the current economic situation we're going through is a crisis of fiat currencies, sovereign debt and inflation all of which makes a deflationary decentralized currency look pretty good in comparison. But it remains to be seen if cryptos can escape correlation to the S&P and break out as their own thing, and whether they can survive incoming regulation.

      More cynically, shitcoins (and the platforms they run on, esp ethereum) will always have a niche because it's basically hypergambling and there will always be retail demand for casinos. In boom times degens want to multiply their winnings and in lean times desperate poors will bet their shirt just to try to make this month's rent.

      I also made it from crypto this cycle. Personally, I moved to Chiang Mai after spending a month in Thailand and really loving it here. The cost of living is pretty cheap, the quality of the housing is better then in the west, flying to nearby countries is very cheap and easy, tons of beautiful girls, some of the best food in the world, and access to a lot of beautiful nature. It does get quite hot in this part of the world though, but honestly if you're posting here you'll be spending all day in an air conditioned house or car so it doesn't matter.

      Here are some examples of a $100k and $500k place in Chiang Mai.

      I have a strong resistance to moving abroad, I am not really a sighsee type to be honest, am pretty autistic and feel like most of the exoticness and 'extras' that people enjoy in foreign countries would just be overwhelming to me or irrelevant to my interests. I just want a comfy house, a dog, a costco, some innawoods activities and go to a bar occasionally with people inside it that look like me and speak english. Also even though I don't live near to family currently it feels like moving across the world would cut off the last remnants of meaningful relationships that I still have to other people, and I'm not very confident that I'm able to forge new ones any more.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I get where you're coming from, but I would encourage you to at least try living in another country for a month or so. I chose Thailand specifically because it suits my autistic NEET lifestyle very well. All the comforts I needed from the US are easily available here. Plus I can get food delivered from anywhere for extremely cheap. There is also a huge expat community in Thailand so there are a ton of westerners, and aside from that many Thais are able to speak English to varying extents. I have easy access to all the things you mentioned (sub Costco for makro, tops, or lotus), and the people are far more civilized then in the US. It's a sad reality you'll have to face that you cannot afford the lifestyle you're probably imagining in the US with only 2M.

        Picrel, I had this for dinner the other day and it cost 399 baht ($10.50 with current exchange rates)

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >black hamburger bun
          Fucking have a nice day gay

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >black hamburger bun
          Fucking have a nice day gay

          that "food" looks like absolute garbage. is it possible to get quality food in thailand?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Haha.. what? 2 mil not enough for a simple lifestyle? You can get any food you want from Grab? Wow. All the luxuries and none of the hassle? Why do you advocate for people to invade other countries?

          Thailand doesn't have enough quality goods and service for me, I got tired of overpriced barbeque. I'm not sure what you are talking about besides covering for a degen sexpat lifestyle with halfhearted bargirls that will drain you spiritually and physically. I hooked up with a top family's daughter last week and I'm not going to delude myself I am compatible with the culture.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            What? Thailand doesn't have enough quality goods and services? What are you even talking about, like what? This is reddit tier LARP and it's obvious you've never even been outside your home country, let alone state.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Like I said, I banged a teen girl there who doesn't go to school and instead drives the family's 500k-1mil supercars around all day. I'm not deluded to think they will include me in their superrich asian lifestyle of mixing champagne with cotton candy in 5 star restaurants, nor do I want to be part of her every mindless instagram post. Shallow and dumb.

              I'm not filipino, a shopping mall does not impress me. My original travel shoes died and I tried looking for shoes I wanted in the mall, luckily found one cool pair and everything else out in the same store of stock. Another online store never shipped a pair to me so I had to cancel, I don't even know if I got the refund. The malls are full standardized crap. I can get anything I want delivered to me in the US but have to deal with the hermit lifestyle there.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                So you're upset about Thailand because of your online shopping experience and some slut? What platform did you use? I've never had issues with Lazada or Shopee. Amazon is full of cheap Chinese scams so I'm not sure why you think it's so much better.

                There are tons of brand name and boutique shops literally everywhere in Thailand. It just sounds like you are either too lazy or stupid to navigate them.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You have cheap asian taste, it seems. I'm a red blooded patriot that needs to FEED. I did find royal jelly in Bangkok, the most valuable item. And I'm not going clothes shopping at Uniqlo, that place sucked ass.

                Anyways yeah Oregon seems nice.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >Royal jelly
                That explains the 'tism I suppose. Anyway, give some examples of what else you can't find and I can help. Did you just stay in your hotel room and Siam paragon when you visited or something?

                >Oregon
                Holy shit lmao. Talk about a place that has turned into a third world shit hole. Enjoy hanging out with morons and dopeheads that will rob you and smash in your window. Try not to step on any needles on the ground too.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I tried to get raw milk in Bangkok and the delivery service never replied to me even though I wrote them in thai. I'd have to go to the farang milk company in Chang Mai, but I'm not going to Chang Mai. I left the country because staying on Sukhumvit just sucks out your soul. That's why I needed the royal jelly.

                Oregon, Oklahoma, Orlando... Where's the spot with everything I need and tight cunty bitch cliquey teens? At least I can get drugs in America, too.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >At least I can get drugs in america
                Weed is legal here and shrooms are widely sold in bars in the south.

                GMPMilk sells it in Nonthaburi. Took me 5 mins to find a place online that sells it. Nonthaburi is a short drive from bangkok. You really did yourself a disservice if you didn't even leave Sukhumvit. What are you so scared of?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                They said they deliver, but they didn't answer my fucking message. Weed ruined thailand, weed is gay and estrogenic. Lots of weed shops with owners from New York and such popping up, or the locals who shoo you along the sidewalk so you don't stand in front of their products. Dumb stoners.

                I'm not scared of anything, I just got tired of sideways looks from slant eyes and not being able to communicate above a 5th grade level. I'm not really a beach person, but I stick around the cooming spots including Pattaya. If I wanted to explore "nature" I do that in America because I'm way better equipped there, and it's so depressing that that's all there is to do there. I just miss my guns and stuff. Anyways I'm in another dense asian hive now and having the time of my life but all things must come to an end.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                What kinds of foods did you have a hard time finding there? I just want quality meats and dairy

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Meat is expensive in asia unless it's street junk and dairy is terrible, it's all ultra processed. I did get some good liver dishes from arab restaurants, that's it. If you go up north try the larb dip, you'll be shitting for a month! Back on topic, plz.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I can live without dairy but I need my meats. If I'm willing to spend the money, can I get good shit at grocery stores?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Idk I just go there to fuck bitches and get out, homie. Gotta get back roastieville and fire up the oven.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                lol ok

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                They have australian meat, but I get better meat cheaper sent to my door in Roastieville, USA.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah, I also order meat online in USA. Where do you buy from?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I can live without dairy but I need my meats. If I'm willing to spend the money, can I get good shit at grocery stores?

                Thailand domestically produces the majority of it's beef, pork, and other foods. It's not hard to find high quality cuts of meat that are comparable to what you would find at say Publix in the US. Beef prices per lb are comparable to the US, if not a bit cheaper. Of course if you buy imported beef from Australia or Japan it will cost more. You can find organic grass fed beef at any major grocery store such as Tops, Lotus, or Big C here, or there's a million smaller stores. There's also the open air food markets, but those are more of a novelty for when you want to order some really rare cuts of meat. Thailand is famous for its food for a reason.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Thanks, anon. This was very helpful. Is the situation similar in other SEA countries? What about dairy?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                No, Thailand is unique compared to the rest of SEA in this way. Dairy products are also plentiful, but if you want something autistic like raw milk you will have to do some searching. They aren't exactly famous for domestic Thai cheese, but imported cheese and domestic cheese, yogurt, whatever you want isn't hard to find.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >No, Thailand is unique compared to the rest of SEA in this way
                Damn, that sucks. Is Thailand good in this regard just due to western influence? Thanks for the info though anon.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                That could have some role, I don't really know. Food is a huge part of their culture so that probably has more to do with it. That combined with very fertile lands for growing crops and livestock.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Sounds pretty based. I've heard they don't have shit factory farming like in the US either

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I haven't spent a ton of time searching but at the Tops and Big C I've been to I only saw cuts of beef for some 700-800+ bht/kg which is actually preddy expensive. In the US it's common to find decent enough beef cuts for 11-13 usd/kg. Is it possible to find prices like that in Chiang Mai? What about wet markets? I am not really worried about getting poisoned from the meat so long as I cook it well, should I be worried though?

                Where do you find Thai yogurts and cheeses? The only stuff I found that wasn't imported also wasn't actually cheese, it was like 30-40% palm oil. Imported cheeses are, as expected, dumb expensive. I just want a simple cheddar or similar, nothing requiring strong cheesemaking industry, is it possible to find this locally?

                I know that was a lot of questions and I thank you for reading and any possible insight here.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                This is a thread about the US. Go over there and get wet to find out. You like to get wet, gay? Want a chopped pig head? Thank you for the fish guts, sawadeekap?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                bro why are u so obsessed with dairy, did ur mom not breastfeed u as a baby

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                French influence introduced cafe sau dau and Thai tea. But if youre worried about dairy supply or prices I bring cans of sweetened condensed milk and put it in my coffee.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Imagine youre on a camping trip or the power to your town is cut for a weak or you just know youre traveling some where fresh dairy products cost out the ass and everyone is lactose intolerant or your plane crash lands on an island and you whip out your can of sweetened condensed milk and instant coffee granules and have a nice cup of coffee on the go while everyone else is freaking the fuck out.

                Same for Mayo, a can of tuna some rice and sushi paper, since you can make a nice onigiri. Mayo packets and japanese mayo dont require refrigeration and are shelf stable. Now that I think of it even the US miracle whip is not sold in the refrigerated section. But its a nice meal and the calories between that and the cafe latte should keep you going and you wont be craving any dairy like ice cream and chicks will see you and think youre smart and hot and have things to offer.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                This is what a vaxxed brain must look like

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Don’t lump him in with us

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >Omg look at that farang with his goyslop packets! He's so hot!

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                How do you think he's able to bang the daughters of primer ministers who drive supercars?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Simultaneously the best and worst post on this board in years.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You’re going to have sex with women by eating mayo and tuna in front of them? Has this ever worked?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >I banged a teen girl who drives million dollar supercars

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah I think they all share supercars because she's in a new one every day. She invited me out one night drinking and I said nahh sounds boring I just coomed. Later I learned she was alone in a Ferrari. Sounds ridiculous, I know.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Give us a greentext story

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                It's not even the SEA thread. Are you sure I should post it here?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                we don't care redard

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Chattanooga, TN
    Iowa City, IA
    Prescott, AZ
    Coeur D'Alene, ID
    Destin, FL
    Morgantown, WV

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Bend will get cheaper during a recession really nice area along with Redmond the only problem is your beholden to Portland politicians who run the state we used to have a very moderate Republican Senator in Gordon smith now it’s two far lefties

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The Triangle area of NC. Access to girls from Duke, UNC-Chapel Hill, and NC State.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I grew up in NC. While this is partially true, the state is being overrun more and more by morons.

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Tough question bro. I'm a burger and am doing my first eurotrip. France/Italy for 6 weeks, currently in Florence. I was enamored at first but honestly the US is the best even with all the bullshit. The caveat is that you have to be wealthy to enjoy the US.

    I spent 8 months last year hopping around airbnb's monthly along the west coast. Best spot for me was Boise but housing prices were retarded. Been living in San Diego since March and it's nice but no way in hell am I paying California taxes. Everything is expensive and living along the beach comes with shit traffic. The women are gorgeous though. But I grew up on the east coast with 4 seasons and it's hard for me to imagine really living without seasons. The last places left for me to consider exploring in the US as a place to live are new england and chicago area.

    No where is gonna be perfect, but I want a house on a lake and access to a halfway decent airport/city when I occasionally feel like it. I realize I like stability more than I'll admit and the nomadic life is wearing on me. I've also realized that a place is a place - it is what you build there that matters. People matter. Find a place where you can make friends. I'm mostly speaking about myself here. good luck bro, inshallah.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You can't do hop around and airbnb in America, it is stupid, pointless and way too expensive. You have to choose a bland small town or city and commit for a 6-12 month lease then hope it's a good one and you make friends in the soulless feminist culture and enjoy the "activities". Then you'll be reading about happier life abroad and want to leave again... I have to go back to the US to recover and refuel, it's the best option for me, so I'm always looking for a place to fit in and landing pad too.

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    What's the best US state to study in?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Florida

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Fly over states? Florida Tampa?

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Forgot pic, it's more realistic of your thai GF.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Bend (that whole area) is completely full of meth/heroin addicts. I've seen a 14 year old teenager smoke meth in the bathroom

    Oregon is better for small middle of no where towns, with maybe eugene being one that meets your size.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Left side of I5 only, srs.

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'd personally buy a house near the redwoods and the coast if i made it.

    that's just my favorite area but it's really isolated. idk why u want to retire and do nothing lmao. move to a city and get a job

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      oh wait u have no employable skills and want to bang teenagers :^)

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I lived in Waukesha, WI for a couple years and I feel it hits most of the things no your checklist. It was pretty under-the-radar until that damn Christmas parade driver fucked things up for a little while. Many times I wish I was still living there; I only left to further my education further North

    >under 100k last I checked
    >no idea on housing prices, but there was plenty of properties up last time I was there
    >good restaurants and bars along the riverfront with a well-lit, maintained riverwalk that I used to stroll down for nightwalks
    >plenty of forested areas and wildlife refuges nearby under an hour drive at most
    >weather varies, there's been pretty hot and pretty cold days but nothing that you wouldn't find in the rest of the US
    >Milwaukee 20ish minutes away, and Chicago 90ish minutes away if you really want some nightlife
    >college town, there's a University right in the middle of the city, with a technical college about 15 minutes to the north
    >plenty of trades available
    >typical college city liberal atmosphere but not overly so as Waukesha County is very Republican; even in the city there's a strong conservative presence with a Republican Party office on Main Street

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >bored walking around sukhumvit sick of sticking my dick in everything
    >big tattooed english tough guy youngish guy my age sits down at corner bar
    >he's a little chatty and naive and I decide to show him around so lets hit some bars, tuktuk man
    >go to thai bar on tuktuk man's recommendation I don't usually go to
    >british bloke pukes on the floor with the first shot of tequila I give him, two high class escorts later look down their nose at me then leave their full beers on the counter and disappear, oh and a blonde with an ugly arab man wrinkles her face at me when I nod to her
    >alright time to leave that weakshit club since a gay thai dude was hitting on me anyway so as we are walking to the street and taxis..
    >HEY hey hey you what are you doing, do you want SEX?? NO no I have a boyfriend over there it's for my friend she shy
    >this girl is like pimping out her friend behind her and tough guy brit says nah man nah I know a thing or two and she looks like she's ***teen that's trouble
    >ok you dark little thing you are coming with me in the taxi let's go take brit home
    >bang her brains out in my condo, she calls me daddy, asks how old I am which is like double, and at one point is screaming so loud like it's rape that it probably disturbed the whole floor and I have to cover her mouth nut twice
    >puts all her garden gnomeelry back on in the morning and says she's going to play golf, on her insta see it's in a lamborghini going 213 km down the freeway
    >only posts luxury goods and expensive cars and restaurants all day on her media
    >wants to meet me at a bar but I'm too tired from a really good rub and tug that night, later saw she was in a limited edition ferrari she must have took out of the compound by herself
    >barely chat with her some more, she seems really shallow and she says of course she has everything, her dad is directly under the prime minister

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >And then everyone clapped

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks for reading my creative writing now cam we get back to talking about roastie towns?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >has sex with a some moron teenager whore
      man your life is sad.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    make sure you bring a few of these bad boys whenever you're on travel. you'll be swimming in pussy

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Meeting women in RL is so fucking easy. So fucking easy.

    1. Stop giving a fuck what they think of you
    2. Take a lap around the bar and talk to everyone. Tell the groups of women you see "Ladies, I got the mayo!!!" then just walk away
    3. Dance and have fun, tell other people about the importance of dairy
    4. Do another lap and ask people if they'd like to try some raw milk. Remember to smile
    5. Let time go by - the single women who are interested in you will begin to position themselves near you. Strike up a conversation, the ice has already been broke twice. Keep it light and fun, joke, be silly. Ask them questions like "if we went camping for weeks and didn't have power, wouldn't you want to have some tuna?"
    6. The ones who are really interested, ask for their number. Hell in a group of four, ask for all their numbers. Remember you stop giving a fuck at 1.
    7. Have good ending logistics, so it's easy and comfortable to take one home with you.

    Rinse and repeat. Hell, I've fucked women all across Asia and I still have a handful of mayo packets left.

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Wow some real fucking losers sidetracked this thread. That's the real soiface right there.

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