How do you guys travel with overbearing parents? I am 24 and have about 80k saved up in various assets and live at home.

How do you guys travel with overbearing parents? I am 24 and have about 80k saved up in various assets and live at home. I am still trying to work on my career but I dream of being a digital nomad and eventually settling down in one place. However, I have a mom who is too used to western comforts and she will never move out with me, my dad may come but he is too much of a cuck to convince my mom to come with. I dont want to abandon them as they get older and I feel like I am getting older and feel like time is slipping away. Idk anons, and with travel seeming like it may come to a standstill with all these conflicts and such I am getting a weird dread of missing out.

How do you balance working on your career and your family disapproving of you and being overprotective/bearing with such a decision?

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >How do you balance working on your career and your family disapproving of you and being overprotective/bearing with such a decision?
    If you're 24 with a successful career and still give a shit what your parents think just fricking LOL. Go back to

    [...]

    seriously this isn't a travel question this is a dumb fee fee's need (you)'s BS.

    > have a mom who is too used to western comforts and she will never move out with me
    Either weird bait your you need to seek a therapist out.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      In some cultures it's expected that a child, especially a son, will take care of their parents as they age
      Not everyone is like Americans where it's normal to make your kids frick off at 18, and then get sent by them to a retirement home to get abused by negress CNAs
      Fricking morons from other boards who clearly don't travel need to shut the frick up already
      Imagine being this closed off to other ways of thinking on a board dedicated to experiencing other cultures

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >mom use to western culture
        >UHHH NO CHUD DON'T ACT LIKE A WESTERNER!

        Seek help

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        filial duty is slavery, and I reject the notion that a person can be born in eternal servitude to another
        geriatric boomers lived through the most prosperous period in human history so far, and had every chance to secure their future without requiring their children to sacrifice their lives for them

        some cultures are objectively shit, and indentured servitude of children cultures are one of them

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        OP and yeah I am middle eastern and so they expect me to take care of them.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        in my culture, it's expected that a parent abandons a child, especially a son as they age keke.

        I had to get married just to afford college so i could get loans.

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Assuming you have a degree, just apply for a job in a different but nearby city. Tell your parents it's a necessary step-up in your career and you want to be able to support them in old age. Visit them regularly in the first year but eventually you'll both get used to living separate lives.

    We're all gonna make it, anon, but we all take different routes.

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You did not consent to be born, and you do not owe your parents a lifetime of labor simply because they created you.

    You are an adult and you make your own decisions. Your parents need to figure out how they are going to care for themselves. We don't live in a tribal setting anymore.

    The only time you should consider keeping a close family bond is if your family has wealth and reputation, and you stand to gain something like a significant inheritance. Otherwise you are giving up your own life so some dumbass boomers can be marginally more comfortable.

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    you are 24
    grow a fricking pair of balls

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You're a pajeet or chink aren't you?
    Grow some balls already

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I’m going to take this post at face value and assume it’s sincere, and also assume that you come from a different cultural background than I do. Where I come from people typically leave home in young adulthood if they can afford to. Like nearly all of my peers, I never lived full-time with my parents again after I left for university. My older brother dropped out of school and moved back home for a few years, which was actually considered a bit strange at the time (although it’s more common now), but he too eventually went back to school, and moved out into his own place.

    Anyway, I moved abroad for a few years right after I graduated, and although my parents visited me, it wouldn’t have occurred to them to try and come with me. They might worry, but they wouldn’t try to stop me. I credit this both to the fact that I don’t come from a background where I would be expected to stay home, and to the fact that my parents were pretty worldly people themselves, particularly my father, who has always loved to travel and spent extended periods in different countries over the course of his career. My mother is less into travel but she was at least game; they got married right before going to South Africa for a year where my dad did his dissertation research, and as an academic he took her along on long-term jaunts in Thailand, Malaysia, Pakistan, and a couple of other places he was researching or teaching as a guest faculty member.

    I’m grateful to have had this. But the opposite side the coin is that having lived far from them for most of my life, on a different continent the last many years, it’s been hard to watch them getting old from afar. If they need me it will take me a day or two to get to them.

    So while I don’t feel the same obligation to take care of them that you seem to, I do feel a bit guilty that I couldn’t easily be of help to them.

    >I’ll get to the fricking point below

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      But they’ve never asked me to be closer. They’ve always supported me to focus on my own personal and professional development first, and then my own family, and been content with regular contact and visits when I can. So the guilt
      I sometimes feel is basically all in my head.

      So, to get to the damned point, I wonder if some of the obligation/pressure you feel is just in your head as well. You say (vaguely) that you want to focus on career development and/or to try to be a digital nomad; couldn’t you make the case that by going abroad (for work, training, education, something else they would recognize as productive), you’ll be better equipped to help them out in the future? And surely they wouldn’t really try to come along, assuming the house you live in together with them is one they own and want to stay in.

      So get out with as concrete a plan of self-improvement or making more money as you can come up with, don’t even think of inviting them to come along, and promise to come back. (If you decide not to come back, you can worry about that later.) Send money if you need to/are already supporting them financially. If they try to stop you (although as you are a legal adult I can’t see what real power they would have to do this), perhaps you can push back with threats—If I do this with your blessing, you will see me again; if I don’t do this with your blessing I might just not come back, etc.

      I don’t agree with those who say “grow up and get out it’s nothing you’re a baby” etc etc etc; I recognize that it’s probably more complicated than that. But you do need to stand up for yourself if you actually want to make this happen.

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    watch Vortex by Gaspar Noe

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Move out and stop leeching off of them and their house so you can save up your own money, you act like a child so they treat you like one. They probably want some space, since you don't even pay the bills. Just go if you are an adult, go! Give them money if you think you are abandoning them, so they can retire.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      this is what it is.

      I was guilty of this for awhile tbh, it was also how I saved up so much money after college. I assume you aren't white american, I'm american but not white and parents being overbearing is expected. At some point you just leave. I get wanting to be there for them, its culturally expected from me too but you can still live your life while being close. The first few times I went abroad for extended times I was still living at home, it was nice to leave and come back as I pleased. They didnt disown me or anything, if anything they respected me more. At the very least you have to move out.

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I have the problem, I keep moving abroad but then I flounder and come back for a few months to live with them. I also will make serious money when they finally die. So I dont know what to do...my plan is leave permanently but tow the line a bit and visit at christmas and stuff until they die and I can cash in.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Unless your parents are 90 they will live without you.
    Go become a digital nomad. Visit your parents regularly. Once you've settled down, live your life. When they start getting really old, offer for them to come and live with you. If they'd rather fall off a ladder and lie on their backs like a turtle for 12 hours because they can't get up and they were too proud to live with you then that is their problem.
    Respecting your parents is a good thing anon. However, you aren't supposed to live in their shadow for the rest of your life. The child is supposed to find their own success and then once the parent gets too old the parents live in the shadow of the child.
    It's like a cycle
    >Parents live their own life and are independent
    >Parents have you and care for you and you piggyback off them until you can look after yourself
    >You live your own life and are independent
    >Once your parents are old you care for them and they piggyback off you until they die

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I am same age but blew savings to buy a car and live in a frat house during university, so I only have $13k in cash and stock assets. Living on your own is definitely blessed and important for your mental development.
      I moved back in in July and I will move out again as soon as i have improved my financial standing somewhat.
      As to travelling etc you are a grown man and just have to do what you got to do. My most exotic travels have been with an eccentric group of friends who I'm only really friends with bc they're willing to travel to exotic places and like travelling for the experience, not as an excuse to do sex, drugs, alcohol

      this is a very good post

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Thanks for the advice frens. My parents are on the older side but I guess I will just have to make do and come back when they need me for things.

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