im solo travelling and its so depressing.

im solo travelling and its so depressing. all the tourists here are either old boomers, middle aged people there with their families, or young people with their friends. im the only young adult foreigner who is here alone. i try to cope and tell myself its because other people my age are too poor to travel. but it just feels so weird how i stand out. especially when i go to a restaurant by myself. nobody else is eating alone. and they probably hate me because i am a foreigner too. i imagine how they spit in my food and despise me. i am so afraid being here. nobody is friendly

  1. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    What country?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      i dont want to say. i'm in west europe

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        I'm in western europe too!
        I saw you alone at the restaurant the other day. Where are your friends, gay?

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          I am in a park in Madrid, deceased.

  2. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    France?

  3. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Seek treatment against depression. Nobody gives a shit about solo travellers.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      I should have seen this thread sooner, I'm solo traveling too and and this place is lifemog and regular mog central. If you're in Madrid we can hang if you want. Extending this offer to anons reading this in their 20s too.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >this place is lifemog and regular mog central
        explain? like just a lot of successful/attractive people?

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, most Spanish people are Chads and Stacies and the incels on this board wish they could be them

  4. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Spain lol

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      sPAIN

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      sPAIN

      Le epic spain

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Spains just boring, all those other people are hurting too

  5. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    listen anon, nobody cares what you do or think or that you even exist

    people are so busy with their own small world they don't even notice you

    stop worrying and thinking and start living

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >stop worrying and thinking and start living
      i have been trying hard. i have been trying to like change my mindset and thinking and also cope with stoicism. its worked somewhat, i am a lot better than what i used to be. but i am still burdened with intrusive thoughts. i have ocd which i think might be behind this

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        try pregnenolone or l-theanine, those supps fix all my social issues / anxiety and depresive thoughts

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        https://i.imgur.com/EHbt1C7.jpg

        im solo travelling and its so depressing. all the tourists here are either old boomers, middle aged people there with their families, or young people with their friends. im the only young adult foreigner who is here alone. i try to cope and tell myself its because other people my age are too poor to travel. but it just feels so weird how i stand out. especially when i go to a restaurant by myself. nobody else is eating alone. and they probably hate me because i am a foreigner too. i imagine how they spit in my food and despise me. i am so afraid being here. nobody is friendly

        Most people, most of the time, are only thinking about themselves. No one hates you, they don't even know you, no one cares about you. You're just a speck passing by in their life, no more important than a piece of paper or a pile of shit on the side of the road. Stop giving power to this idea that your happiness is determined by what other people have or how they seem to be reacting to you. Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparison is the thief of joy. Plus, for all you know, the dudes with the families could be the unhappiest in the room.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      [...]
      Most people, most of the time, are only thinking about themselves. No one hates you, they don't even know you, no one cares about you. You're just a speck passing by in their life, no more important than a piece of paper or a pile of shit on the side of the road. Stop giving power to this idea that your happiness is determined by what other people have or how they seem to be reacting to you. Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparison is the thief of joy. Plus, for all you know, the dudes with the families could be the unhappiest in the room.

      I've literally been reading this weepy shit on my phone while sitting in a restaurant in Nepal eating a shittychow mein. Nobody gives a fuck about me. Nobody is looking at me, Nobody is talking about me, Nobody is thinking about me.
      No one fucking cares.
      Take your meds. Seriously. You need Xanex or valium or something.

      Nobody stares and nobody cares anywhere. You have a mental health problem.

      You are lying or delusional. People do care about other people they see. It is partly conscious and partly, but randos even on the street and of course in the restoraunt pick up details about your appearance and behaviour.
      However this is rarely important if you go to a normal tourist spot as nobody will attack you over it. People can approach you if something clicks for them but if your objective is to simply enjoy food you should not care about it either.
      Yes people always judge but it happens for everyone and you should worry less about it. Also if you feel judged in a bad way understand what you should change.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        take your fucking meds why do you care about what other people think? no wonder you're so miserable ... ffs

  6. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    op here, traumatic exprience i just had:
    >have no idea where to eat because i am a foreigner and dont know the language, have just been eating the grab and go shit but decided i need to try the local food because thats what you do when you travel
    >get recommended to go to this resturaunt
    >check online and it was booked for the next 2 hours
    >decide ill just find some other place to eat on google
    >cant find anything, go back to the one resturaunt
    >its booked until 4 hours from now
    >go out and walk around the block looking for resturaunts
    >they are all either full or are too intimidating for a foreigner or have lots of judgemental party normies and girls my age so i cant go to them
    >walk further out, still cant find anything, eventually end up back at my hotel
    >go around the area a second time
    >find a restruaunt that looks like it might be ok
    >go inside and there is a girl as the bartender
    >she tells me to let me know when i'm ready to order
    >say ok, but in a moment of indecision leave the resturaunt
    >end up back at my hotel again, notice a resturaunt nearby that doesnt look intimidating
    >walk inside, suddenly get nervous because i dont know what to do
    >go up to someone who looks like he works there
    >hi
    >hi
    >silence
    >get nervous and ask "how are you"
    >he gives me a weird look
    >the other guy that works there comes up to me and gets me a table and food
    this whole thing took about 4 hours. i thought traveling was supposed to be relaxing, but all i want to do is stay in my hotel room. i thought this was supposed to be fun

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Being a loner and a total failure at life hated by everybody myself, my advice is never go to a restaurant alone unless:
      1-the restaurant is in a big city
      2-it's a week day

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        3-the restaurant is not fancy or romantic

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        3-the restaurant is not fancy or romantic

        I'm somewhat socially awkward and go to restaurants alone all the time when I'm traveling. The last time I was in Greece there was a fancy/romantic restaurant with a separate dining area with a view overlooking the sea and no one was eating there, all the tourists were over at the main restaurant, probably because they wanted to eat around other people. I didn't give a shit so I went in and sat at a table all by myself and ordered a nice meal. Best dining experience I had the whole trip. No one to bother me and If made me feel as though I had the place to myself. Point is, stop caring about what other people think. That's the first step to having self confidence. Also if you are going solo traveling you have to feel comfortable with yourself and enjoy being by yourself. Otherwise you should just stick to hostels so that you can meet other travelers without feeling so out of place. Just try not to give off creeper vibes which it sounds like you might have a hard time with OP. Practice on boomers if you can't get up the courage to talk to young people.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          First of all stop feeling bad for travelling alone, most people are scared shitless of even thinking of traveling solo. So you're already a legend in the making.

          Ditch the hotel, book a bed in a nice hostel. They have common areas there (most people in hostels are solo travellers as well)so hangout there and just listen to the stories.
          You might befriend somebody or be just invited for a walk/pub crawl/whatever.

          Keep travelling, being alone in an unknown place will build your character.
          Don't compare yourself to anyone

          I actually stayed at a hostel a couple days ago. It was in a small town so I didn't have a lot of options, so I was kinda forced. It was a party hostel, below the rooms was a bar that was very noisy. I avoided it for as long as I could before finally heading up to my room at 22:00. There was only one person in my room despite there being 6 beds. She was a girl my age. I was absolutely terrified. She said hi to me, and I said hi back, and that was all the communication we had. I laid in my bed awkwardly for an hour on my phone and didnt talk to her and imagined having sex with her before i fell asleep.

          the idea of sleeping in a room full of people my age is very scary to me. that time it was ok because it was just one person. but if there were 5 other people and they were all talking, I would hate it. i would either have to join in on the conversation or be the odd one out and not talk at all

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            You have to build up your confidence slowly. Go to the bar next time and see what happens. Worst case everyone is already part of a group that knows eachother, in which case don't bother trying to socialize, it wont work unless they approach you first. More likely though there will be a mix of other travelers including those who are solo/want to meet new people. If you can't handle sleeping with other people in the room just book a solo room at the hostel. Also put away your phone when you are around people. Nothing says "don't bother me" more than someone with their nose glued to their smartphone. Unless that's what you want of course. As for enjoying your own company, you should focus on doing things that interest you i.e. if you like nature go visit natural places, if it's history, check out some ruins or archeological sites. Google maps will be your friend here. If you are just wandering around aimlessly waiting for something to click, you are in for a mixed bag and will probably have a subpar time, but sometimes if you don't know what you like, that can be a good way to have new experiences even if not all of them are pleasant

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            Holy autism

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            Jesus Christ man get out of your comfort zone. Talk to people make some new friends.

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Why book a hostel if you know you hate the experience? I know I'll fucking despise every second of shared accomodation so I don't and have never tried hostels.

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              This, I would rather sleep at the coach station waiting for the first bus out of there if there weren't any private rooms available anywhere.

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Do you know about alcohol?

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            >In a hostel room alone with another girl
            >Imagine having sex with her, but never initiate due to fear of sexual assault charges

            Hello, me

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Holy kek I am laughing irl. Why are you so negative? You are on VACATION and all you can think about is negatives

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          I've literally been reading this weepy shit on my phone while sitting in a restaurant in Nepal eating a shittychow mein. Nobody gives a fuck about me. Nobody is looking at me, Nobody is talking about me, Nobody is thinking about me.
          No one fucking cares.
          Take your meds. Seriously. You need Xanex or valium or something.

          >empty restaurants
          >thirdie restaurants full of manlets

          those dont count. Im pretty sure the problem is when theres large groups of normies around

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Also if you are going solo traveling you have to feel comfortable with yourself and enjoy being by yourself.

          /thread

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Boomers are so easy to talk to. I even get compliments sometime for a good convo. Gonna miss when they're all dead cause people my age can't hold a convo for shit.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      Also, where are you?

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >every restaurant is full
      bullshit, unless you're staying in a mountain town in the middle of nowhere with 5 total restaurants this sounds so fake
      >bartender girl invites me in, i just walk away because of indecision
      Wtf are you even indecisive about, i thought every other place was full? Easy decision.
      >took 4 hours to go to a restaurant and eat
      Holy fucking autism
      >i thought this was supposed to be relaxing and fun
      you legitimately need a psychiatrist if you end up wasting 4 hours getting a bite and being traumatized over the most basic of social interactions.

      How the fuck are you actually not dead?

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        gaslighting fuckhead, Europe isn't America, you just walk into Applebees wearing a Monster hoody and sandals and eveyone greets you with fake smiles so you'll give them a big tip. Restaurant servers in Europe are notoriously rude even if you know the language

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          What are you talking about? Servers in Europe are not rude at all, you are just an american used to american standards. Thats pretty retarded to call them rude just because they wotn suck your cock for pennies.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          european here. he is right, OP is fucked up and needs therapy. im socially awkward put even I cant relate with that post at all.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >european servers are notoriously rude
          No they are sterotypically rude, but by american standards they'd actually be standoffish or at worst inattentive. They're not actually rude and won't treat you like shit, they just won't hover over you every 2 minutes to make sure your water doesnt ever drop below 40%.
          >theyre rude even if you know the language
          with basic french I asked a (hot) waitress if she had splenda (diet sugar) for one of my family members. She was taken aback and offended because I actually asked if she was on a diet, when she realized what I meant we both laughed it off and no rudeness at all was to be had even though I had practically insulted her to her face.

          What your post tells me is that you have never once been to Europe, and the other two anons seem to agree.
          >gaslighting fuckhead
          Not even what gaslighting is you mongoloid ameritard, I'm being extremely direct and truthful.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      this sounds ridiculous but i could totally see it happening to me
      Normies have a way of making loners feel like shit. Especially if you're a manlet and dont look like you have any sort of presence.
      They just ignore you and then you have to be the asshole to get any sort of service, which defeats the purpose of giving that particular establishment your business if they cant even greet you properly.

      • 5 months ago
        Anonymous

        Restaurants are not for lonely fags, you fucking retard.

        The only "restaurants" you can go to alone are foodcourts, taco-trucks, family diners on week days, truck drivers diners, that's it. How hard is it, YOU FUCKING AUTIST?

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          I deserve good food. Ive had enough of the pleb shit.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          I've been to plenty of restaurants alone and got good service, maybe people like you and OP should just kys if you can't perform a simple task like ordering in a restaurant.

        • 5 months ago
          Anonymous

          >The only "restaurants" you can go to alone are foodcourts, taco-trucks, family diners on week days, truck drivers diners, that's it
          t. has never traveled for business

          • 5 months ago
            Anonymous

            and fast foods, and the restaurant in the hotel you stay in.
            You can go to about 50% of all restaurants, and the other half you should avoid. And that's not being a sperg.

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              Please tell me about what restaurants I can and cannot visit as a solo traveller.

              • 4 months ago
                Anonymous

                I'd say fancy romantic restaurants where you have to dress up are off the table. I go to all the other ones no fucks given

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        nah this is pretty accurate even for solo chads and old rich guys. I paid for a meal/beers when I was alone at a bar and they gave me a bucket of fucking change when I paid for it just to show their disdain for me.

        You have to get thick skin and not be a fucking coward and stand up for yourself. I complained about the change thing and they said they "didn't have any bills because I paid with too high of a bill". I just kept complaining until they finally gave me proper change. No issues, was respectful about it despite them trying to rip me off, and set it right. I told them I will never come back and spend money at their bar after that. Fuck them.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >I told them I will never come back and spend money at their bar after that
          Why did you do that when that was obviously their goal when they treated you badly?

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Normies have a way of making loners feel like shit
        No. Normies don't do that. YOU do that. YOU make you feel like shit. The normies do not give a fuck about you, they are normies. They do not have autistic brain blast meltdowns over every person they interact with. They forget about you the moment you leave their sensory range. That is, unless you do something to leave a big impression, such as losing your spaghetti and having a panic attack over a simple three word interaction like OP.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          yea this is a tough reality i just had to accept. what was actually going on is i had this warped and malignant narcissism that made me believe that people were actually paying attention to me because im attractive AND alone so its something they felt they had to focus on. but you just think to yourself "do i remember what these people i saw today looked like?" you'll find the answer is usually no.
          HOWEVER, you cannot go to clubs alone. one time i tried to mingle at this table with a girl and her mutual friends that i didn't know. I realized it wasn't working out and there wasn't enoguh room, so i opened a bottle alone at a table right next to there's. that was a fatal mistake. people in the club quickly started looking at me and blatantly jeering because i was some fucking loser alone with my half drank bottle. it was devastating. i did some loser laps around the club, and then tried to try and whisk some of their table over to mine and they BARKED at me to go away. it was so fucking depressing i just left. here's some other things i do
          >scope out hotels and deliberately seek out the ones that have no taxi stands or other hawking stations nearby.
          furthermore, i look for hotels that have secluded entry and exit ways that are away from any businesses. this way, if i order a large pizza for myself, i dont have a fucking peanut gallery of people seeing me go get my pizza on a friday night at 6pm.

          one of the most dreadful feelings is the apprehension you have to steel yourself for when you know you're going to walk by a taxi stand and they're going to just keep fucking asking you if you need a ride even though you've politely rejected them everyday for the past 4 days. then, the apprehension when you make your way back to your hotel (alone of course) and they inevitably ask you again. it literally makes my stomach sink. i just want to scream out LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      moron just sit down at a table and order food lmao

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Watch a series with a cool protagonist like Cobra Kai and be like that guy. Its the only way to change if you have no such people to surround you with. Will have to watch at least one season to change.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      i'm going to diagnose you now: you're just retarded. nothing else

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      You'll adapt eventually anon. I was like this too when I took my first solo vacation. I didn't want to leave the hotel room. After a while you just get used to the surroundings but don't lock yourself away. Go out and get scared. Fuck it you just forked out how much money to do what you're doing.

      Allow yourself to live a little. You deserve that. You were probably depressed and anxious at home, so what's different now? Go out and try at least.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      i dont mean that condescendingly but you would benefit from not being a fucking pussy cuck loser (and also therapy)

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      legitimately wondering what the fuck is wrong with your head

      >restaurant
      >intimidating

      its a place where people go and eat. if you suffer from social anxiety (which you clearly do) and agoraphobia (which you likely do), how about baby steps first. jfc

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        not to even mention having the RETARD AUDACITY to complain about solo travel in a generalized way as if IT is the problem and not your retarded ass

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      This is pretty much me, except eventually I give up and find a supermarket (preferably with self checkout) and buy a bag of chips to have for dinner.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        this may be the actual saddest thing I've read on sighsee

        why even leave your house?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      I have the same thing and for anyone else who suffers from this I hope the following advice helps. Like others have said, other people don't care about you, 5 mins later they will forget about you. You are causing this pain yourself by connecting unrelated stuff you experienced. It's like the gamblers fallacy. If you throw a dice 20 times and it falls on 6 every time doesn't mean there's a bigger chance it'll fall on 6 again, our mind tricks us.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      It’s ironic. This type of person seems like he’d be the perfect workaholic. No life, might as well just work in some bullshit freight handling position and gamble all your wage on shit coins.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      I can second the idea of just tricking yourself into thinking you're an anime mc

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Just understand that about yourself and eat alone after getting stuff at the grocery store. Cheaper too. Eventually you will make friends

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Happens to me too, now i go to the restaurant alone only for lunch, it feel less weird.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      If it makes you feel better, nobody knew that you were walking around for 4 hours. You are the only person who did. I bet nobody remembered that this happened except for you. The girl probably shrugged it off and assumed that something came up and you had to leave. So let me ask you, why does this traumatize you if nobody was being malicious or try to humiliate you? If they looked at you weird, they probably thought you were a local at first until you opened your mouth and outed yourself as a foreigner; in that case, you are let off the hook from the awkward encounter because it was a simple misunderstanding. It's not like you were drunk and acting out of pocket to then be filmed and hated by the whole internet. You weren't even being an autist because you had self-awareness. There are far worse people out there who are sheltered, entitled, have a psychotic breakdown from the culture shock, etc. You had none of those.

      What

      this sounds ridiculous but i could totally see it happening to me
      Normies have a way of making loners feel like shit. Especially if you're a manlet and dont look like you have any sort of presence.
      They just ignore you and then you have to be the asshole to get any sort of service, which defeats the purpose of giving that particular establishment your business if they cant even greet you properly.

      said about normies making loners feel like shit because you are a plain manlet is not even true. It's called being insecure. Nobody is going out of their way to make you feel like shit, and no you don't have to be an asshole either, you just have to be assertive--especially in poorer countries where people have to act more selfish for survival.

      You should be glad this happened to you because you learned to:
      >practice more of the language before travelling
      >plan at least some things in advance to avoid stressful situations like this, especially when it comes to attractions, venues, restaurants, and lodging. Shopping and exploring can happen any time
      >do more research on the area you're going to
      >handle rejection and intimidating situations a little bit more

      Even if you still feed stupid about this, you became a better, smarter, more prepared person.

  7. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    what kind of blackpilled pussy LARP gay shit is this? Solo is the ONLY way to travel. Yes, it's ok to meetup or share SOME of your time with friends, family, or a love interest during your adventure but travel is YOUR time. If you like to eat out and get lonely go to the mall or grocery store and invite someone to go out to eat with you, your treat. You'd be surprised how many yes's you'd get even for neckbeard incel like yourself.

    jfc I hate eating with people other than family and love restaurants alone with a nice view, tasty meal, relaxing ambiance, bottle of beer, and a nice waitress

  8. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    It sounds like you didn't plan out your trip so now you feel a sense of aimlessness. You dont need to micromanage but you need some vague idea of a goal otherwise your're just fucking around.

    • 5 months ago
      Anonymous

      >another loser non-RT

      NO! The unaimed arrow NEVER misses you faggity butthole licker

  9. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    oh poor you being so super special and unique that everyone pays attention to you instead of getting on with their own lives

  10. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    Just go stay in a hostel OP. I was exactly like you when I first solo travelled and it was depressing not meeting anyone my age/ spoke english

  11. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    >autists falling for the travel meme because of sighsee

    hate to see it

  12. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    First of all stop feeling bad for travelling alone, most people are scared shitless of even thinking of traveling solo. So you're already a legend in the making.

    Ditch the hotel, book a bed in a nice hostel. They have common areas there (most people in hostels are solo travellers as well)so hangout there and just listen to the stories.
    You might befriend somebody or be just invited for a walk/pub crawl/whatever.

    Keep travelling, being alone in an unknown place will build your character.
    Don't compare yourself to anyone

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >most people are scared shitless of even thinking of traveling solo
      do they really

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Yes.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          any story

  13. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    your mindset is negative
    your character is negative
    negative energy repels positive energy
    the only thing you can have complete control over is your mind and you chose to be negative, think negative and do negative
    imagine travelling Spain, alone, as a young man, and not being happy.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      This.
      Get your shit together, OP. Outside of the very apparent autism and plethora of possible mental issues, what you and every other autistic fuck agreeing with you don’t realise is one thing: Nobody gives a shit or has a second thought about you. You’re an extra in every other person’s life and they will forget you exist 5 seconds after they see you. Waitresses don’t give a shit if you’re eating alone, with your parents, or with the queen of England. They wanna serve you food and maybe get some tips if all goes well. Adults eat alone all the time for a variety of reasons, I assume you must be very young because only teenagers will be so insecure to think doing so is in any way uncool or judgement worthy.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >muh energies
      What you are trying to say is that he's physically ugly.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Spain has its ups and downs man, seeing all the happy, attractive couples can really get to trucels that aren't fully blackpilled yet.

  14. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I've literally been reading this weepy shit on my phone while sitting in a restaurant in Nepal eating a shittychow mein. Nobody gives a fuck about me. Nobody is looking at me, Nobody is talking about me, Nobody is thinking about me.
    No one fucking cares.
    Take your meds. Seriously. You need Xanex or valium or something.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >sitting in a restaurant in Nepal
      >eating a shittychow mein.
      Then it's fast food not a restaurant.

      Also Asia doesn't count. You can go alone in a restaurant in Tokyo, no one will stare

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Nobody stares and nobody cares anywhere. You have a mental health problem.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          You can split hairs about how literal the "staring" thing is, but you will be judged differently in Asia vs Europe for this. If you know, you know

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Actually people in many med countries do stare a lot, but they stare at everybody. Greece, Italy, those fuckers love to watch and observe people. You just have to realize that you are not a special case, and get over it.

  15. 5 months ago
    Anonymous

    I've been in your shoes, but my thing to do is put my headphones on and block out all the other annoying ass boomers, families with brat ass kids, and zoomers being zoomers.

    Nobody hates you, nobody cares about you one way or the other. I'm used to being by myself and I prefer it that way. When I travel I do what I want, go where I want.

    I've traveled with friends before and it's always a night at the opera full of drama "let's go here, no I want to go here, wait let's see what this is, no I don't care about that..." fuck all that.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah, a group of three is ideal travel number I think. Anymore and you have too much competing interests (tired, hungry, don't want to do this, etc)

  16. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    This thread is full of autists and OP is autistic. Just stay home next time and grow up before travelling alone, if someone with your condition can even do that.

  17. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Just go to a Hostel ?

  18. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Jesus you got this board seething for some reason
    Anyway I can totally relate. I had this EXACT same feeling frequently when I solo travelled in Europe. Sometimes I'd meet cool people, but overall I felt out of place much more often than not, and not in a fun way.
    I have had a much better time with solo travel anywhere that ISN'T Europe. Especially Asia. My advice is to ditch Europe and it's stuffy rigid deadness and try Thailand next time. Infinitely better experience for solo travellers even if you're not in it for coomer shit

  19. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Op, I suggest you start journaling. On my first big trip I had lots of anxiety and literally did not eat a single thing for 3 days. I was in asia so I had cheap street food but only after telling myself that “its what youre supposed to do overseas”. I had lots of embarassing encounters, but I now understand that the other people all forgot about it in 10 minutes and I only remember it because I felt a lot of emotions in that moment. You are the awkward foreigner, there’s no way around that so there’s no need to worry about it (I assume youre reading the enciredon, which can help change your perspective for the better on such things).

    I’d argue that the type of solo travel you’re on is not intended to “be relaxing”. Really, I travel to do the opposite, to get out of my comfort zone and force myself to grow, eustress.

    If you have a diagnosis of OCD or depression/anxiety, I’m sorry to tell you this but the only way to get better really is to look inward. Medication helps and therapy is great, but as youre not home I say you need to journal, especially if youre alone. Even better is talk to people you trust, write letters or wifi call them, its great.

    You need to have compassion for yourself, set aside dedicated time to listen to yourself and love yourself. This cultivation will help you in stressful situations. If youre overwhelmed, you will be more able to be still and say to yourself “Ok, how do I feel right now?”

    If you dedicate yourself to self-compassion, you will grow and suddenly the things you find overwhelming now will just be whelming. Many people never do this work and find that they need to do heroin to handle it.

    In a few years you might read what you wrote now and see how far you’ve come. In the meantime try to see the absurdity of you worrying about the opinions of people you will never see again.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >If you have a diagnosis of OCD
      I do have a diagnosis of OCD. At first I thought it was only the contamination stuff, which I got over. But now I'm realizing that it is much deeper than that and that I am experiencing it much of the time I am in public or interacting with people.
      >dedicated time to listen to yourself and love yourself
      what do you mean by this specifically? like what do i actually do when i do this?

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        It would be best to speak to a therapist if you haven’t yet. I went for a few months and even just the experience of it was hugely helpful. Therapists are there to listen, they have compassion and listen to you while you talk about what youre feeling, they know of methods that have helped other people and can help you try them and see.

        Imagine someone you love came home from work and had a bad day, you care about them so you listen to their troubles. (I assume youre a dude) Men have the tendency to offer solutions, but when it comes to this sort of thing all you need to do is listen to the person, just be there and listen. Give hugs, say nice things, speak up if they say “I’m so stupid” or something that isnt true. It was a great revalation to me that I need to do this with myself. Have the time and space to ask “What emotions or feelings am I having, when did they start, are they permanent or does the intensity wane overtime?” Etc. Eventually you get more skillful and you can even do it while you are having these strong emotions. It’s funny that when we feel good we say “this wont last forever”, but when we feel really bad we think “this is terrible, my life is terrible, I will always feel like this”. The skill here is being able to remember that nothing is permanent.

        Also, talking about these things has a way of reducing their power over you. A lot of people spend decades avoiding the thought of their traumas, training themselves to never dwell on it, hoping that it just goes away. The fastest way to the otherside of the mountain is through it, but dont imagine that it’ll be easy.

        A huge thing is to know that you are not the only person with these feelings. Lots of people may be feeling the same as you right now, and with the internet people are much more open about it. For example, the author John Green has lots of yt videos about his experiences of OCD.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          (2/2) I dont have OCD, but I do feel so much better with the things I’m dealing with. When I was 18-20 I just reserved myself to my fate “I have social anxiety, I don’t like to talk to people, thats just my personality”. Try not to be so fatalist, we all change and grow. Our minds are our own, but it takes a lot of skill to really cultivate our minds to a better place, a lot of effort. We need to be able to step back and observe our minds.

          I carried a journal with me, and when I felt a lot of emotion I would write. At first I wrote as if I was talking to my therapist, and my practice changed overtime.

          Dont think that youre too good for meds, or that they’ll make you less of a person or whatever some people say. You need to atleast see how you feel with them and if you want off you should ask your doctor first, not just cold turkey.

          Whatever family or friends you have, keep the relationship going. Humans literally evolved to talk to people, it is our defining trait (that and thumbs). Everyone needs people they can lean on.

          Finally, when you develop your compassion, when you better understand your own suffering, you will find that you are a more empathetic person. The homeless guy on the street, you can see how maybe he has NO ONE to talk to, no one to listen to him. That sort of shit is torture and its why people drink so much. When you can see people as people, and you become a better person. All the people in this thread calling you an autist have either never had such psycic pain issues, or are not even aware of the ones they have because they dont allow themselves to think about them.

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            It would be best to speak to a therapist if you haven’t yet. I went for a few months and even just the experience of it was hugely helpful. Therapists are there to listen, they have compassion and listen to you while you talk about what youre feeling, they know of methods that have helped other people and can help you try them and see.

            Imagine someone you love came home from work and had a bad day, you care about them so you listen to their troubles. (I assume youre a dude) Men have the tendency to offer solutions, but when it comes to this sort of thing all you need to do is listen to the person, just be there and listen. Give hugs, say nice things, speak up if they say “I’m so stupid” or something that isnt true. It was a great revalation to me that I need to do this with myself. Have the time and space to ask “What emotions or feelings am I having, when did they start, are they permanent or does the intensity wane overtime?” Etc. Eventually you get more skillful and you can even do it while you are having these strong emotions. It’s funny that when we feel good we say “this wont last forever”, but when we feel really bad we think “this is terrible, my life is terrible, I will always feel like this”. The skill here is being able to remember that nothing is permanent.

            Also, talking about these things has a way of reducing their power over you. A lot of people spend decades avoiding the thought of their traumas, training themselves to never dwell on it, hoping that it just goes away. The fastest way to the otherside of the mountain is through it, but dont imagine that it’ll be easy.

            A huge thing is to know that you are not the only person with these feelings. Lots of people may be feeling the same as you right now, and with the internet people are much more open about it. For example, the author John Green has lots of yt videos about his experiences of OCD.

            i dont have anyone to talk to

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              you can talk to me 🙂

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              You're talking to someone right now, anon.
              Therapy and a little bit of liquid courage are your friends

              • 4 months ago
                Anonymous

                im scared of therapists...lol

              • 4 months ago
                Anonymous

                you're an imaginative cunt. you can imagine all the bad possibilities of an interaction. good for you. but not quite good for yourself caz you using it negatively. interpret your brain power well. it will affect to your real world.

              • 4 months ago
                Anonymous

                yeah?

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              im scared of therapists...lol

              >I don't have anyone to talk to and I'm too scared to fix it

              Alright buddy, best of luck out there

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >dedicated time to listen to yourself and love yourself

        Not that anon, but watch Youtube videos by Plum Village. Buddhist teachings have helped me quite a bit in handling my autism, anxiety, depression, etc. The short of it is to accept your feelings, practice mindful breathing (making sure to breathe slowly and fully as best you can all the time), staying present in the moment and not in your mind and have compassion and love for yourself. I recommend reading or watching "divine" content too, when you routinely engage with teachings of the Buddha or Christ, you become more "centered" in healthier mindsets.

        You legit sound autistic too (it's often comorbid with ADHD, OCD, etc.), and while there is nothing wrong with that, very few (if any) people will come into your life and get you easily, let alone treat you well. If you can't learn to be at peace when you're by yourself, you'll probably increase your chance of committing sudoku. Love and peace fren, good luck.

        why do gays here always shill therapy whenever some anon has anxiety problems. The only way and best way to deal with you being nervous and anxious in public is to face your fears and just do it. Get a job as a waiter or retail, go interact with people more, build up your social skills and you will slowly become desensetized and stop caring about what others think. I know it isn't easy but it is the only way for you to get over it, talking to some cunt one on one won't do much and will just be a waste of money and might make things ever worse if the therapist is bad. The key is to take it slow, and just start walking and when you see a cafe or restoraunt go inside take a seat and order, eat and then leave. Do this at least once a day and your fear will eventually go away

        >The only way and best way to deal with you being nervous and anxious in public is to face your fears and just do it.

        This doesn't exactly work if you have autism/are highly sensitive, you're body is built to be very receptive to stimulation and even mundane social frivolities can drain you. Yes, you should know how to talk to others and even have scripts ready to interact with the plebs to dodge point deduction on your social credit score. But these interactions wouldn't be the anxious person "being himself," and is thus him being dishonest with both people and himself. Being dishonest with yourself is not self love, ergo it should not be done if it can be helped.

        Anon, I speak from experience, I spent most of my twenties "learning how to socialize" and then I realized I was being unbelievably dishonest to myself and everyone around me for the sake of not upsetting them because I'm a sperg. You have to accept yourself and unfortunately, tell others to fuck off when they bully you.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Anon, I speak from experience, I spent most of my twenties "learning how to socialize" and then I realized I was being unbelievably dishonest to myself and everyone around me for the sake of not upsetting them because I'm a sperg. You have to accept yourself and unfortunately, tell others to fuck off when they bully you.
          I'm not saying you should fake a persona and do the ''fake it till you make it'' routine. I'm just saying if you have anxiety problems and you feel uncomfortable in public and social interactions you should get out of your shell and face your fears if you want to lose your anxiety or at least keep it in check. Whether you want to have friends or not or if you are naturally introverted then you can do what ever you want, I'm just saying how to lose the nervousness of talking with normies which I suffered from in the past. Having to feel nervous being around public can lead to bad roads, whether you want to use your confidence for making doesn't matter. You should feel comfortable in public whether you are alone or not

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I'm just saying if you have anxiety problems and you feel uncomfortable in public and social interactions you should get out of your shell and face your fears if you want to lose your anxiety or at least keep it in check.

            Kinda, but again, if you're a more sensitive type of person, that's WHO you are, that can't be changed. So if OP's anxiety gets triggered very easily while dealing with people, he shouldn't be eating at busy restaurants like a dumdum and should eat elsewhere. Again, you CAN learn coping techniques. You CAN learn to navigate basic human interactions. You CAN'T not be sensitive if you are sensitive. I really want to stress this point because it might be one of the reasons why anxiety would get that bad in that scenario, and just "getting good" and throwing yourself out there is not necessarily the answer. By paying attention to what he is feeling and trying to figure out why, OP can figure himself out. You don't need travel to find yourself, but it does make it easier since you don't have the same influences as you would being at home.

            >You should feel comfortable in public whether you are alone or not

            True, but I subscribe to Kaczynski's critiques on how modern people are overly socialized. People CAN ruin your life if they don't like you and have power to do so, cancel culture/social credit are the most egregious examples of this. If you've been an outsider for most of your life, chances are you were treated poorly via negligence or outright bullying. This isn't to make excuses for being fearful, but to point out that people can be a threat to your well being so anxiety happening is plenty logical.

            Being at peace with yourself gets rid of fears that control you and that includes regulating your behavior for others. If you're comfortable in your own shoes to know you want to be camping alone VS being at a bar sharing stories, you won't be mentally tormenting yourself.

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              Holy shit this must be the worst advice I've ever read on sighsee

              >that's WHO you are, that can't be changed
              >You CAN'T not be sensitive if you are sensitive
              > throwing yourself out there is not necessarily the answer

              God help the poor fatalist soul who accepts this because it conveniently removes all responsibility from them to change or take action.

              >People CAN ruin your life if they don't like you and have power to do so
              What in hell are you talking about? Nobody is going to ruin your life after talking to you for a few minutes. How would a stranger you meet while traveling ruin your life? Do you think you'll get stabbed or canceled on twitter?

              >This isn't to make excuses for being fearful, but to point out that people can be a threat to your well being
              This entire post is making excuses for being fearful.

              Anyways, I used to be afraid of social interaction. Traveling, putting myself out there is what helped me become unrecognizable from who I was 10 years ago. Maybe therapy or medication is helpful for others. Either way, do something about it. Conversations are some of the most meaningful experiences in life. We're all agents of thought and action leaving our small marks on the entropy of the universe. What a cosmic waste to let your biologically driven social anxiety inhibit you from sharing your thoughts or taking actions in the physical world.

              • 4 months ago
                Anonymous

                it's more true for people who aren't in the extreme but already comfortable in their moderate existence

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Not OP, but I'm too afraid to journal since anyone could open the book and read it. I journaled once and it felt really good but a week later I ripped out all the pages and threw them away cause of that fear. I'm thinking about just getting a stylus and writing on my phone lengthways. Won't feel nice or the same as paper but at least I feel safer about not having to worry about a physical thing.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        That's funny because the journals I used to keep were so short hand and would make no sense to anybody that tried to read it. More of a list of things to remember than a reflection on it. I don't journal anymore. I don't view travel as a thing to make stories or memories anymore because nobody really cares about your travel stories and I prefer to think about the present and future than past now.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          I agree about being in the present, but it is also useful and good to think about the past and future, when you want to. Especially if youre like OP, you cant just igore stuff. It can take work to get to the point where you are able to stay in the present without your mind wondering involuntarily.

          About people reading your shit, you’ll have to get over it. I am on my third journal so if someone is going to do the work of getting to what I wrote today, they obviously like me. Once I read a page of my hostlemate’s journal and I felt so dirty doing it I will never do it again, and most of it is so boring that no one would ever bother. That said there are one or two things that I dont refer to directly, but I instantly know of when I re-read, just so that there’s no incriminating evidence that I tried to stop jerking off so much.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Are you a 12 yo girl?

  20. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >try to see the absurdity of you worrying about the opinions of people you will never see again

    this

  21. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    i understand why OP is depressed, he's in sp*in

  22. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    How has no one in this thread discussed the anxiety related to the fact that as a solo-restaurant customer during peak hours, you are taking up an ENTIRE table, sometimes a 4 seater, meaning the restaurant is literally losing potential revenue every second you are there, unless you spend 2x or 4x per unit time. Is this just an avoidant personality disorder trait or what?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      You're entitled to eat there just as much as a party of 5 is. The restaurant's revenue is literally not your problem, why concern yourself with it?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      they usually have tables that only sit two people, anon, it's not that big of a deal.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      When I worked at a bar and restaurant sometimes single people would request a table with some privacy and they’d just browse their phone or something while they ate. So he could try that. They also seemed to loosen up if they sat at the bar opposed to a table. I’ve only traveled in the US but I always ate at the bar of restaurants near my hotel.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      They will give him a seat at the bar or a table with two chairs. If they have the availability that night, they can absolutely give him a 4 seater table for himself. They aren't going to lose business like that or stop him unless it's some high end reservation only place.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Maybe it's because I worked a travel job, but it's inconceivable how so many people think they are judged for eating alone. Holy shit nobody cares. Also why do you care if they care? What possible consequence will come from a stranger judging you with a five second thought before stuffing their face with another handful of fries? I swear people will do anything to hold themselves back from finding happiness.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Restaurants are limited by the size of the kitchen, not people in tables. Sometimes they make you wait outside, even if there are tables physically open, because the kitchen is so busy that it is only able to start your food an hour from now. Its better to have you a half our outside and half inside so you wait longer.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Don't go during peak hours.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      I don't give a fuck. When I was in Cordoba I took a 4 seat table for myself because it was the only empty one. For some reason they took forever to get the bill, just as a test (and because Cordoba was boring so I didn't care) I waited to see how long it would take for them to check on me so I could ask for the bill. My waiter attended to all the other tables but kept skipping me, even though they served me right away. After an hour and a half I went to the bar to pay the bill and left a negative review for being racist. Some of them don't give a fuck if they're losing money. Thank you for reading my blog.

  23. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Terrace House
    Kino. I hope you find your Lauren Tsai, OP

  24. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    just get takeaway delivered and have reception at your hotel collect it and call you

  25. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    why do gays here always shill therapy whenever some anon has anxiety problems. The only way and best way to deal with you being nervous and anxious in public is to face your fears and just do it. Get a job as a waiter or retail, go interact with people more, build up your social skills and you will slowly become desensetized and stop caring about what others think. I know it isn't easy but it is the only way for you to get over it, talking to some cunt one on one won't do much and will just be a waste of money and might make things ever worse if the therapist is bad. The key is to take it slow, and just start walking and when you see a cafe or restoraunt go inside take a seat and order, eat and then leave. Do this at least once a day and your fear will eventually go away

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      yeah you are right

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      I'd suggest driving Uber. I think that immensely helped me with conversational skills and not being a total autist

  26. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    If you dont want to do something then just dont do it. It's easy.

  27. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    dude your traveling mingle with the locals.
    >muh feeling lonely
    you have the internet and people did this shit in the 1800s for like 10 years at a time

  28. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's very hit or miss but when it's miss it's terrible holy fuck this hostel is LITERALLY a class trip of 20, a family or two, a few couples and maybe 1-2 single women. There's no one to talk to even

  29. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    When I travel alone I always go to places where I'm sure other will never follow me, but I don't like to visit major western cities. The more the place is hidden and hard to reach the better, and it's pretty great, I get to see what I want to see, sleep wherever I want and just whatevere the fuck I want all day. Nobody wanted to go with me when I wanted to see India, SEA or literally anywhere that didn't have a McDonald every 5 minutes or a four star hotel every night.
    If I were to follow someone all the time I would have never left western Europe

  30. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    going on holiday alone is a ticket to depression since 95%+ people succeeded at life and partnered up and basically are there to compare to each other and see who mogs who it's why anyone does anything it's all competition

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >literal NPC midset
      Sad!

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        COPE

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Literal female mindset

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      bro I travel to coom in new foreign pussy. I don't wanna be around any couples or women from my country. If I see them I go in the opposite direction.

  31. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    my lonely ass managed to find some company during my solo trip through europe only through cheapest hostels. lots of travelers there who are also lonely or with whom you can talk. just ask someone how are they doing when the moment is right. drink alcohol

  32. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    i ate alone in restaurants and cafes everyday for 4 years across many countries. no one is paying attention and the looks of "oh, a foreigner" pass within a second and they get back to their own woes. some days it was bullshit doing it but usually it was just whatever.

  33. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    OP is an entitled, verging on Asperger's typical millennial.

    /thread

  34. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Think like an anthropologist or sociologist and focus on everything going on around you. That'll get you out of your narcissism for a bit. I say that out of experience.

  35. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    iktf don't let any of these gays say otherwise. you ARE special and yes they ARE judging you

  36. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    sorry to hear that
    I've always had a great time travelling solo
    but I make friends easily and enjoy the moments I have to myself

  37. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    What did we diagnose OP with? I am the same, recently travel just brings home to me that I am lonely and alone and I am 36 and I have no wife or girlfriend, I never will and soon my parents will leave and I have no other family happy couples exploring in the Highlands while I drive around alone and lonely just hits me so hard. So the way to met people is to go out and drink but I can't do that as I am always alone, my friends all have kids and don't know what a bar is. It's depressing. I also struggle badly with how alone I am. I think what I've gathered from this is don't go to Spain, I'm going to Italy & Germany soon. UK was quite crushing due to all the immigrants and overweight people and arabs and blacks who have managed cute white girlfriends. I mean they don't even lift, fuck this gay earth

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      A therapist would help. Admitting struggles anonymously is one thing but speaking to a real person would help you dramatically. The stigma against it is dying and you have client confidentiality so no one else has to know.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      If you don't like solo travel then travel with someone else, join an organized tour group or just don't travel.

      I love solo travel cause I'm too busy relaxing alone, seeing interesting things or banging overseas hotties to be worried about all that other bs.

  38. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I solo traveled in Spain in 2019 and your anxiety might be more centered on where you are. Madrid and Barcelona can be intimidating because they are big cities and get super crowded because of the big nightlife scene. Try some of these cities if you haven’t already:
    Sevilla
    Granada
    Valencia

    All are easily connected by Spain’s rail network. When looking for restaurants I would recommend the tapas bars. It’s very common for Spaniards and tourists alike to grab a quick bite at those. They can vary widely from location to location, too, which gives you a chance to really experience different flavors.

  39. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Get take out food if you don't want to eat in a restaurant alone.

  40. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Felt the same way last time I solo travelled, also am young. Kinda just degenerated for 2 weeks, put urself out there though, no clue how

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Don't eat but once a day
      >Always make sure you get something good when you do
      >Drink liquor rest of the day

  41. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Solo travel sucks unless you are a chad, just like everything else in life really.

  42. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Be friendly. Connect with people. Make friends.

  43. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    it's all in your mind. I worked at a restaurant in the center of Milan and people were eating alone very frequently, men and women. Nobody gives a shit, especially the staff. All they care about is getting you your food and getting a tip for it. I prefer to travel alone because I can do what I want when I want and eat wherever I want at whatever time I want. Imagine passing up on some tasty food because your monkey brain comes up with all sorts of shit to prevent you from stepping out of your comfort zone

  44. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Told you not to travel solo

  45. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Hey anon, I know what you mean. Half of travel is who you travel with. I would suggest starting a travel blog/vlog. Even if it doesn't get a lot of views, I find solace in that there's at least someone out there reading and watching so I never feel alone. It also distracts me from depression and loneliness. You could create an online pseudonym if you don't want people you know IRL to see it, and only strangers. It really motivates me. Getting into photography and writing keeps me motivated, and it's always nice for a rainy day to look back on your thoughts and feelings from years ago. Then the right person will stumble upon you and want to become friends.

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