Ask an airline pilot of 1 years and half anything

Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68

UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68

Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Estoy es american?

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Have you ever jerk offd while flying the plane?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      No but I have as a passenger like 6 years ago when I was around 14 and I really regret it. Cause it’s really sinful and stupid

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Do you and the co-pilot ever give each other the Dutch rudder?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        You are 20 years old and a pilot?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          21

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >21
            >airline pilot
            lol
            you should have done your research, moron
            airline pilots (737 and larger) at minimum are 25 years old

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Ah figures it's a stupid LARP post.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                That is an untrue statement, plus I don’t fly the 737 and in Canada there’s no 25 year old rule

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Maybe he pilots cessna with propeller, that is possible.. but i've never seen a 737 pilot who is under 26.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Cool cause I never flown a 737

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Very untrue statement

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    iz u kangz or iz u aint?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Gotta redo the Chart-A, the weight and balance is definitely off.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What happened to MH370? Pilot suicide? Remote hijacking? israeli tricks?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I think what happened is what happens to mother penguins when they lose their child

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do you use xplane or fs2020

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Fs2020 but it’s really trash, I use it to do dumb stuff

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The performance is dogshit. It's stil fun as a hobbyist though. I love planes but the lifestyle around being a pilot looks fricking awful. Maybe one day I'll get a ppl for shits and buy a small plane even though I like commercial planes. Judging from that pic, are you in a 787?

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is it fun?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      No, it’s not fun, unless airplanes are your INTENSE passion, DO NOT BECOME A PILOT, even if you have the money it takes a lot of sacrifices and hard work, this is not simply a career, it’s a lifestyle, I have no money and I had to move for like the next year until my contract is up.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >I have no money
        Jesus, what's your payrate?

        Also do you or any other pilots fugg any of the flight attendants? I've heard the girls are turbo hoes and the men are raging power bottoms.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yes a lot of them are turbo “hoes” and I make 4K a month while the guy or girl to my left makes 10-14k while the guy or girl in the United States makes like 20-30k a month. So you know, I guess I’ll continue to enjoy my tuna fish, ramen eating life with no friends or anything, away from home doing my “dream”

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        why did you do it if it sounds like you aren't truly passionate?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I am extremely passionate but when you have no money, no friends, 20 hours away from home, no nothing, it makes you feel like crap, plus on top of that I’m a leaf

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            any passion turned employment takes a while to pay off. ive been following my passion I suppose for the last decade and only in the past 2 years has it really been paying reasonably well

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            hmm maybe as you advance in the hierarchy you'll get higher pay and thus happiness?
            Also it should be easy to bang some stewardesses I would imagine

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              It’s not about just the money, it’s about everything, the whole concept, I’ve been lied to my whole life and everyone has been mean to me and I’ve never sought revenge and I never will but it just bothers me and when you have no cash it makes it 1.5x worse

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I am extremely passionate but when you have no money, no friends, 20 hours away from home, no nothing, it makes you feel like crap, plus on top of that I’m a leaf

        I actually think you're the real deal. I was on my way too but it got real gay real fast and that wasn't what I was after in the end. Still like flying though.
        I recommend playing shitcoins on the side.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Do you know where the brake pedal is?

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Bix nood?

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    they still require a vaxpass?

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Are stewardesses as horny as I've heard?

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What's the best kind of horse?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Crab in Bucket, meet Horse in Pen.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It's a metaphor for death that they are showing you.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >the 6 foot Chad's vs the 5 foot 11 manlets

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous
            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Horselett BTFOd.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Are black horses more rapey than white horses ?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Yes. They also have less money and lower IQs.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Whichever horse is nice to my Frens

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Checked. Never change anon.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      As if he just went through time portal. Mind: blown.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is it true all the female flight attendants are huge bawds from being on the road half the week? Do you bang them?

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Who's the safest carrier to fly with that has pilots and mechanics that know what they're doing and not diversity hires? Who makes the safest planes?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Delta or southwest

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is the world flat?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I’m not to quite sure

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is it too late at 33 to become an airline pilot?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      No it’s not too late, but unless you have a lot of money it’s really not gonna be fun but if you do have money then it should be so so. But you gotta do it the intense route

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It is definitely too late in Switzerland.
      They dont hire anyone above 25.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Would you fly air India sar

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I’ve learned in life that I’m a useless dumb piece of shit, everything is outta my hands and is in the lord Jesus hands. I swear if you see me in real life you’ll see as the most emotionless person ever, I’m dead inside. I just don’t care. I have faith in God

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This is not what I want to hear from my pilot

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        That's fricking scary, I think I'd rather roll the dice with a Black person as a pilot than a depressed christcuck

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This is not what I want to hear from my pilot

        That's fricking scary, I think I'd rather roll the dice with a Black person as a pilot than a depressed christcuck

        >Yeah uhhh this is your Captain speaking...
        >so just remember that from here on we're all in God's hands, not mine
        >...enjoy the flight

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          That was true of every plane ride you ever took whether the pilots admits it or not.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ive also heart about the female fliget attendants being realy loose and into kinky stuff…is it true?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes it’s true

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes it’s true

      kinky stuff such as?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I have no idea but I know for a fact that Lufthansa flight attendants are extra loose and extra dumb but they’re good people

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Do you know if any of the airport wagies have comfy jobs? I'd never be a pilot but wouldn't mind working on the runway or whatever.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Airfield Maintenance is pretty comfy especially if you drive the sand trucks.

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Whats your ratings/how many hours have ye.

    Curious how different it is from here in FAA land

    pic rel is my day job

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      1200 hours
      Dash 8 rating

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Ah regional. That sucks. I like the dash 8 though, wish it was in msfs. Kinda shitty as a passenger though

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Black person leafs build Black person planes man, of course they suck to ride in. dash 8s look like flying pencils. better hope that crosswind landing is under 2 knots or youre 75 degrees crabbed getting bounced all around. my dad was a pilot, forced retirement about a month ago. he said there's a popular saying between pilots about dash 8s. "dash 8s are supremely gay Black person pencils with israeli tendencies"

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Top fricking kek. I'm used to flying a320s in the sim. Too EZ. I like a little bit of judaism at minimums for the challenge. The Black folk I can do without so I just disable the ramp monkeys

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Damn how many hours did you need for the ATP equivalent in leafland?

        It's 1500 hours here which is stupid IMO and the main reason I stay in software (also I can smoke weed)

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          You need 1500 hours for your ATPL

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            but you can fly pax without it?

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Yes

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          but here in Canada if you have 250 hours and a special exam, you can become a co pilot on big planes. It’s sort of like frozen ATPL

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The thing is, here in Canada you can become a co pilot in a big airplane with really low hours however we get paid absolutely nothing. Imagine making 50k monopolies leaf dollars after paying 100k for an education and having to wait at least 5 years to make the “big bucks”

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Can I touch your hair?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Sure but I have some coconut oil on it

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    why cant I wear a parachute while riding in a boeing?

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Poltards are flying airplanes now
    Never stepping foot on a plane ever again.

  22. 1 month ago
    Analnonamous

    Do you really need to sit there or can we just sell 2 more tickets?

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ever had to ask one of these newfangled jeet or Black person controllers to repeat their unintelligible instructions?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Black ATC is worse than eastern europe and Western Europe ATC.

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Who are your stinkiest passengers?

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What does FL370 mean?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It means flight level 370
      Altitude = 37 000 feet if you altimeter is set to standard (29.92 inches of mercury) or (1013.15 hectopascals )

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks OP…
        >a fricking leaf

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    would u get on a flight with women pilots?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Some of my captain are women

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is the earth flat?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I don’t know

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Do you have to continually nose down throughout long flights once at altitude to account for the curvature of the earth? I bet you don't.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Why would he need to? Gravity is present.

  28. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >IQ?
    >How much you make a month?
    >What's the most fricked up thing you ever saw?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I really don’t know, sometimes I feel dumb and sometimes I feel smart, everyone calls me smart but I feel like they don’t know the real me. It’s either like 90 or 120. I’ve done 1 IQ test and it gave me like 115 but I don’t believe it.

      I make 4K a month while the guy/woman to my left takes in 10-15k a month (how??)

      The most messed up thing I’ve seen is that procedures are broken 24/7 everywhere, there’s not a single company that cares about training or safety or anything. It’s really concerning but i have no friends and no one cares about me so why should i care

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >I make 4K
        The frick? I make 3.5K a month and I deliver pizzas
        >It’s really concerning but i have no friends and no one cares about me so why should i care
        Why don't you start dating some hot stewardess fren?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Because I want a noble woman and not a stewardess (some I assume are good people) but you know, when you’re eating ramen noodles and tuna fish and your nice car broke down so now you gotta drive some weird looking old car, I don’t have any confidence. It’s insane how much money I had as a 16-18 year old.

  29. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    OK 'Cap try this.
    What is the most serious defect you have registered on the defect list but have still decided to fly with.

    If you are actually a pilot then you will be familiar with the procedure.

  30. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How safe is the A350? How many things must go wrong before I crash (I'm a passenger)?

    I might have mild phobia of flying.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      A350 is the safest plane that has ever existed

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Care to explain some reasons why is it so safe? What if there's a fire that's extinguished but it burns important electrical wires?

        Why doesn't Airbus allow overriding fly by wire?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Airbus flight protection envelope can be overridden if that's what you mean. Just disable the ELAC kek

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Oh wait that's a320 only nvm idk what it's called on a350

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              You can still override everything

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Yea I just don't know what it's called. Airbus systems are so fricking cool though. They really are a modern marvel of engineering

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I don’t know anything about airbus but even if you lose all hydraulics you’ll still always be able to fly the plane, insane redundancy, experienced pilots, ideal wienerpit layout, it’s just a breeze to fly

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I hope you're right. I'll have to step in an A350 soon and I have irrational fears that the plane's gonna crash because the universe hates me or something like that. I guess the fear is based on me having no control over the plane, guess I'm a control freak.

  31. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How many UFOs have you seen? Have you seen the light orbs? What do they look like while flying?

  32. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Have you seen a UFO whose origin is not from planet Earth?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I once seen a hot air balloon close to the down wind where I was about to land

  33. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    how much is the pilot license in Canada? Here it's 40K usd

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Here it’s between 70-100k CAD

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Sure but I have some coconut oil on it

        >ask me anything
        Did you post from that 777 yesterday, or the day before, whichever it was

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          No it was not me

  34. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How dangerous is flying REALLY? I don't believe the mainstream bullshit about Airline Safety. How bad is it?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      How dangerous is it? Honestly, I think this is the most accurate statement, it’s as safe as driving in an Uber for 23 minutes in the subburbs

  35. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    what's the point of being a pilot in current year when the flight attendants are either old, fat, or male?
    is it true that pilots close their eyes 3 seconds before landing just to make it more challenging?

  36. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    how did you get to be a pilot at such a young age ?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I really went the intense route, I put 99% of my paycheck in it, I didn’t sleep for 2 years. It was hard, that’s why right now I expected to be rewarded just a bit and I guess I am since I am living my “dream job” but people still treated me like crap and now I have no money

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >I have no money
        >earns 4k a month

        I earn 0 for 27 years and live at parents and haven't been able to find a job. Stop whining, homosexual.

  37. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Just one question, OP

    Picel

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The horizon doesn’t change
      So A

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        wdym it doesnt change

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Look at a straight line like the horizon in front of you and tilt your head in any direction even upside down, that straight line is still a straight line

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            ok you are trolling.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vestibulo%E2%80%93ocular_reflex

          Your eyes remain horizontal in your eye sockets no matter how you tilt your head, so the picture your brain produces stays flat and the horizon remains level in the distance. Unless you have a disability.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            what about when I look overhead? how do they rotate instantly 180 degrees?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Your eyes remain horizontal in your eye sockets no matter how you tilt your head

            ma dude this is straight steaming BULLSHIT. Eyes are engraved staticaly in your sockets, they dont rotate like balls in a cup of water you absolute troglodyte. I feel dumber just explaining this things

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              ok you are trolling.

              alitalia chad, are they just fricking with me?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Just go look closely in a mirror and tilt your head. Notice your eyeballs stay upright while your head moves. It's easy to see since your iris has little lines in it that provide good reference.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Perhaps not for stunted pygmies such as yourself, but if a normal human being goes and looks in a mirror and tilts his head, he'll notice his eyeballs are remaining in their original orientation.

              If you're playing video games or watching a camera recording from inside a banking aircraft you will see a different effect. You're simply demonstrating that you're a no-wings homosexual.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      B.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It’s over

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >its a cuz horizon never change

          dude give me a break

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        In your video games, perhaps.

  38. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Would you rather fly an Airbus or a Boeing?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I’d rather fly an airbus because it’s way more comfy

  39. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Where do pajeets poo on the plane?

  40. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >mfw my A350 pilot's gonna be some stupid newbie frogposter

  41. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do you do long or short haul? Passengers or cargo?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Short hauled passenger and cargo

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I get the idea cargo would be better to fly then passengers. What's your take on it?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, flying for FedEx would be a dream come true, but they only hire American pilots

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            What about pic related?

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I would love that too. Anything to get out of here

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                MIddle East or Africa if you have no patience

                Otherwise just grind hours and become captain where you are now, life and pay become much better then.

                Get 3-4k hours with 1k captain and you're in a much better position to apply for positions that pay 100k+

                Keep some money aside to deal with layoffs/companies going out of business, it's part of the industry. I was about where you are now when 9/11 happened and no one got hired for a few years

  42. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do you have a blowup doll in your wienerpit?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What ?

  43. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do u use ForeFlight?
    Are u part 121 or 135. Purely civilian experience?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      We use ForeFlight but the prices are stupid

  44. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Hey man, what should I do to get into flying? It seems my only option is join the military or sign up for these cadet programs. Only problem is I can’t fly Sunday cause I got church, so I’m pretty sure that makes airlines not an option. Thoughts?

  45. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How much did all your training cost?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Almost 100 grand CAD which is like 60k euros

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Yea, why I never became a pilot. Just leaning to fly a cessna is too much for me

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          It always feels like that, just don’t care, it’s that easy

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I'm in my mid 30s now, so I'm well past that idea. But congrats on your part

  46. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Calgary is a shit show

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      https://i.imgur.com/CM6bX3q.jpeg

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      https://i.imgur.com/CM6bX3q.jpeg

      https://i.imgur.com/bTQrNDH.jpeg

      [...]

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      https://i.imgur.com/CM6bX3q.jpeg

      https://i.imgur.com/bTQrNDH.jpeg

      [...]

      https://i.imgur.com/COv3sZs.jpeg

      [...]
      [...]

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous
        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous
  47. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do you ever feel like crashing the plane just to get out of your missery? No more tuna and nudels life?

  48. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    do you see the curve of earth?

  49. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Who was the most incompetent pilot you have seen?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I had to look in a mirror to figure it out

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Well you're not dead yet!

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I’m joking, sort of, I’ve noticed that pilots are pretty moronic and the training is very moronic

  50. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Do you believe in chemtrails?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      No but the government does in fact alternates the weather

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        How so if not with chemtrails?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          With some weird lasers, some weather guy for the government accidentally said too much in our class but who cares

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Also if you check on 9/11, the weather was supposed to be Relatively Shit that day but it was a perfectly clear morning, that was done intentionally, i did a whole mini project on it until i lost my usb key in a hotel

  51. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How the FRICK do I work an FMS?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You’ll only truly understand when the company gives you training, the dash 8 is actually pretty simple

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        at what age is it too late to start?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Anything after 22 you’ll be miserable unless you have a lot of money, then you’ll just be unhappy

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        OK. I will continue to poke at them in MSFS like a monkey.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          You should get Aerofly FS2023 on your phone, it’s the most realistic flight simulator ever, buy all the airplanes, it’s like 15$

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >on your phone

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I’m telling you, all the buttons actually work and it’s most similar to real life physics

  52. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Tell me about /skg/ fren

  53. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    How does it feel that a bunch of pajeets might take control of your plane at any time using object oriented programming?

  54. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What's with your syntax? Are you white?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Sorry, I went to French school

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        So you're Quebecois?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yes and no

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          First language is English ,but I’ve never learned it, properly. If you heard me speak, you would never tell, you’d probably think im super awesome

  55. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    WHOOP WHOOP TERRAIN TERRAIN WHOOP WHOOP

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >lands safely
      I love landing and when all the warnings are saying "PULL UP" kek

  56. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    have you started experiencing your vaxx injuries yet or are you still waiting for the other shoe to drop

  57. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

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